Dear You,
IT'S OK NOT TO BE OK.
I know you're hurting. I know how difficult this thing is for you. You may think that you've made wrong decisions AGAIN. You may feel stupid for letting "history repeat itself", but hey, cliche as it may sound, but everything happens for a reason. The purpose of all these things will be revealed to you as soon as YOU ARE READY to see it. Right now, just, EMBRACE THE EMOTION. Feel it. Let your heart be broken. Nothing wrong with that. It happens. Soon, after all the pain, you'll realize HOW HAPPY BEING HAPPY IS. Don't try to cover up the pain, the more you do, the more it becomes eager to show itself. Let it be.
I know you have worries. I know you have been thinking too much. I won't tell you to stop worrying coz I know it's hard to do. But, I'll tell you what, you don't have control over everything, but YOU HAVE CONTROL OVER SOME THINGS. So why not focus on those, and work them out? If you keep on thinking how they could get through, you yourself would not get through. Let them see things with their own eyes. Let them work on the things they have control over, just as you should work on yours. Just trust that they can do it; that's all they need. That's all you can do for them.
I know you're sad. I know how much you want to cry, and I know that you don't understand why those tears just won't come out. Relax. Maybe not now, maybe not yet. Maybe your heart can still handle it. Isn't that a good news? You've always been a crybaby, but look at you now, no tears. You're handling things well. You're handling things with grace.
You're doing great, don't worry.
Hugs,
Val
